January was a month full of these messy events that are hard to dictate and even harder to put pen (or hand to keyboard) I think though sometimes it is important to share the good, the bad and the ugly because then we get to see how the different puzzle pieces of life fit together. The bright colors of joyful times and the darker hues of times that challenged us and made us stronger.
January was definitely a character building month. I'm not saying anything drastic happened, but there were events that were emotionally and physically overwhelming. First off, I nearly got deported out of the Dominican Republic. Because I didn't have the right forms handy, I was told I wouldn't be able to enter the country and was physically walked out to where the plane was supposed to be to ship me back to the states. Oh the irony of being an American kicked out of a 3rd world country...trust me I know.
The only reason I'm still in the country is the plane I was "supposed" to take had already left and there wouldn't be another one until the following day. Since, they had no where to put me, they let me in on the arrangement I would show them the proper forms the next time I traveled through. Of course, when I reached luggage claim, mybaggage had already come and gone and there was literally no one from my airline on site. Apparently they had all gone home since the last flight in (mine) had left hours ago.
So, with no luggage and feeling very fragile and vulnerable, I had to walk the gauntlet of greeters eager to welcome their friends and families. So you can probably imagine, I looked quite out of place...walking by myself through balloons, welcome banners and smiling faces, with tears streaming down my cheeks. You could've heard a pin drop.
That day, definitely would not rate among my highest here, but luckily it is the past. I'm hoping that some day, not yet, it will make a great story or perhaps give me street cred. I also am happy to report that when I went back to the airport the next day to get my luggage, they did not deport me as my paranoia hypothesized. I did bring my body guard, aka Rovian, though I'm not sure he knew that's why I begged him along. Surprise!A week later in January, my roommate decided that leaving Santo Domingo and returning to the States was the right move for her. I'm not going to get into the details, but it was definitely an overwhelming experience for all involved as we tried to adjust to the "new normal" Having to say goodbye to someone who was a big part of my life here in Santo Domingo and adjusting to being the sole occupant of the apartment was difficult. No more prophetic words were spoken than "It is not good for man to live alone," oh man is it hard.
I also had to say goodbye to my very favorite furry friend who was my cuddle buddy, he was even named after Rovian himself and shared in the same goofy personality. Little Rovi, was one of Amy's kittens that I had been hoping to keep after she left, but the school told me that since I would probably have a new roommate who may or may not have the same affinity for cats, they wouldn't allow him to stay. So, I worked with Amy to find him and his "sister" a forever home that would be just as worthy as the home we had here at the apartment.
So there you have January all summed up in a messy smeary storm cloud painting. The silver linings in the clouds are there as well. I see the life savers God threw me shining through the events, so that I was never drowning, but always knew I had something to hold onto. God was there in the airport on that emotional high day. He was there in the security guard who was trying his very best to comfort a blubbering little confused gringa.
He was there in helping to carry the load and burden on my shoulders of the emotions that came with saying goodbye to my roommate. He was there in the love and kindness of Rovian, who washed dishes, played games and who sat and listened to every story, every problem, every prayer throughout the entire experience.
As a new month starts, I want to say that I do not fear Januarys anymore or months like that. I know that there will be terrible, heart wrenching pain ahead that is far worse than I've faced, but I also know that we serve a God who is greater than the world, who is greater than those problems and will send peace, so that in those moments we will not fear. I pray for you right now, wherever you are, that you will be reminded that God loved you so much that He died a horrible death rather than let you go and though your sorrows may reign in the darkness..mercy, grace and hope will come with the dawning of the sun.
"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." -Matthew 11:28-30
